We are the co-creators of our reality, having a direct and conscious impact on manifesting the lives we want to live. This is a very important concept to integrate into our consciousness as we embark down the path of our healing and awakening. It can be a huge breakthrough in how we view our reality, and we can find a lot of self power in discovering the control we have over the direction of our own lives. But, as with most things in this day and age, it can be easy to keep this concept trapped in a veil of independence - I am creating MY life. Especially when so much of our culture easily lends itself towards self-isolation, we can forget that we aren’t just creating our own personal lives. We do, in fact, have a role in creating everyone’s life. So what happens when we expand this idea of co-creation beyond our individuality?
Nothing in this world exists in pure isolation, we are always in relationship with everything around us. We have a “personal” aspect to our existence, of course, but everything in this reality (including ourselves) is constantly interacting and being shaped by everything else surrounding it. When it comes down to it, my reality is continually shaping your reality and vice versa. We live in a world of cause and effect - every action has an equal and opposite reaction. It would benefit us greatly if we could become more mindful of how we move through space, because we are all in this together.
There’s a reason airplanes say put your own face mask on before helping others. We don’t do anybody any good if we’re walking around not operating at our best in the present moment. We need to take care of our own baggage and wellness first (emotional enlightenment - we are always tending to this part of ourselves, we don’t fix it once and come out healed). But we can’t only put on our face mask and neglect helping others with theirs. A part of evolving spiritually as embodied humans, while living in reciprocity with all things, means sharing our healing gifts in collaboration with others.
It’s true that lasting healing begins within ourselves. But that’s not enough - it only begins there. If we want to actually see impactful and lasting healing that saturates the entire planet, we need to come together in purposeful co-creation for something bigger than our individual selves. We need to find unity in community. We’re living in a time where if we don’t make large shifts in how we operate as an entire species on this planet, well, we might not be a species on this planet anymore. Which is why this concept of purposeful co-creation is so needed at this time. We have fallen into the bystander effect, which states that the greater the number of bystanders, the less likely it is for any one of them to provide help to a person in distress. Imagine what might happen if instead of standing around and watching the distress all around us like deer in the headlights, we all stood up and each took responsibility for our role in communal change.
Our own self healing is always our foundation, but we encourage you to begin shifting your focus towards the healing of your family, friends, local and global community. So take this idea and implement it within your life, and it can be as simple as beginning with the close relationships you have already. Cultivating a practice of everyday mindfulness within your relationships by truly listening and being present in conversation is a great way to set up the space for purposeful creation. Set an intention and create something together! Work towards actually manifesting something, anything, that could not have existed if it weren’t for the contributions of each party involved. It can be challenging, but the rewards are worth it.
We each have an important role to play, no matter if it’s big or small. If each person on this planet can begin to make the shift and integrate this idea of co-creation within their community, that change in mindset is going to be felt within the greater collective. Each person’s shift will be contributing to a more reciprocal and communal mindset to the energy of our species, and that absolutely plays a role in the change we want to see. It can be overwhelming to think we are alone, and to try and make a difference in the world all on our own. But there is so much beauty and change that we can create by working together.
We’ve created a new Gateways PDF to help you come together with your community and create something. Like we said, it can begin small. This Synergetic Gateways is meant to help bring you into a space of collaboration and feel what it’s like to birth something into this world with the help of others!
Lyz: Knowing when to talk and when to listen is an essential part of meaningful and mindful communication. Each and every one of us wants to be heard and seen for who we really are. But in this desire, the ego creates a habit of wanting to respond, closing off the space to really receive what is being said from the other person. Our own needs/wants are important but understanding that the same needs/wants are present in another is a huge part of purposeful co-creation.
Megan: Agreed, and it’s not always an easy thing to do, living in a culture that idealizes independence, our ego is always going to be there to stop us. But pushing through those conditionings has opened up my life to more connection and community. As someone with an Aquarius/Pisces ascendant sign in her natal chart, it’s really easy for me to distance myself from others and live in my own world. I often prefer my own company, working on creations and solving problems by myself. While there’s absolutely medicine in solitude, I tend to find a special kind of medicine when I decide to open up in purposeful co-creation with others.
L: As a space holder and healer, I am always looking for ways that I can ease the suffering of another. The only way that I can really do that is if I understand what they need at the core. In listening to how they want to truly express themselves and removing my egoic need to respond, an authentic connection can be made. And more often than not, when I offer that space of mindful listening, the other person in turn offers the same space to me.
M: We all occupy the same space, we simply see it from different perspectives. I see the world from my point of view based on the experiences I’ve accumulated. At the same time, everyone else out there sees the world through a different lens, based on their own unique experiences. Not only can we learn new ways of thinking from others, but they also act as a mirror for us, reflecting back our own perspective. Therein lies the beauty and blessing of creating relationships with others. When we collaborate together, we end up seeing the whole picture more clearly, and there are so many wonderful tools and ways to create deeper and more mindful connections.
L: There have been several tools and practices that have helped me tune into the space of earnest listening: NVC (nonviolent communication) and the Shambhala practice of mindful listening. NVC teaches that there are ways to communicate our emotions without pointing the finger of blame at another. By breaking down the parts of mindful communication, we can express our needs/wants with clarity and without triggering the other person into a place of defensiveness. The Shambhala practice of mindful listening is about letting one person speak their mind freely, while the listener refrains from verbal or visual feedback, including head nodding and “mmmhmm”s and “yeah”s. Your only job is to listen and then when it is your turn, to express. It’s simple in nature but provides a profound simplicity of connection and understanding.
M: Whenever I’m working on a problem, it’s easy to swirl the issue around in my head and try to work out a solution. But I’m usually missing something, and after a while I feel like I’m not getting anywhere. That’s when I know it’s time to suck up whatever egoic issues I’m having about asking for help and bring my problem to a friend for an outside perspective. When I do this, they see they problem with fresh eyes; they bring in their own opinions and thoughts on the matter, and you know what? I always gain the missing piece that I needed and I always end up feeling better. My friends and community always contribute a new piece to the puzzle. As long as we leave our egos at the door and come into relationships from an open hearted space, we can receive what others offer us..
L: When we focus on how we wish to respond to what is being said, our attention is only within ourselves. Taking the ego out, makes room for our words and messages to hit a deeper level of empathy and remove the boundaries that keep us from the freedom of genuine expression. From there, we can find a common ground of all our needs/desires to find a way to sincerely co-create together in a positive and harmonious way.
M: We are perfectly capable of doing things on our own and living our life independently. But throughout my experiences I have found that life is so much more joyful when we willing and vulnerably share it with others. It can be a hard thing to do and I will openly admit it’s still something I need to consciously work on. But every time I make that choice to turn towards others, I am building a stronger sense of community. And I truly feel that authentic communal connections is the medicine that is so greatly needed in this time. When we open up our minds and hearts to seeing from another’s perspective and collaborating together, then we can all move forward faster, creating and evolving towards a more beautiful existence for everyone.